Finding the middle ground to walk seems to be developed by stepping off in either direction quite a few times and deciding that neither side holds for you what the center offers.
Having spent a lifetime of being off the curb, more than on, I think I'm starting to get the hang of this "curb" thing. First, there are those nudges, that as a younger soul, we really don't pay much attention to. Though, as we progress along our path, either through experiences or through years, those inner nudges become more meaningful to us and we begin seeing them as a source of inner wisdom--a teacher right in our own heart! The more we pay attention and act upon those nudges, the stronger they become.
And second, be spontaneous. This allows life to bring us to the situations, people and learning processes which we need to experience for our own growth. Every person who comes our way has a gift for us. The kind, generous, witty ones are pretty easy to be around and they carry their own gifts. But, those others--the grumpy, opinionated, naggy, drama kings/queens--now there are where some real challenges/lessons lie! If they are all in our lives for a reason, then we must ask, "Why, this one? Why at this time?" Sometimes they pass through our lives in a short while, but other times they may be a family member or someone we have chosen to be close with, and we get learning by repetition. One of the gifts the second group offers to us is that they spark judgment within us--we can see their faults so quickly. I call this a gift, because whenever we are annoyed with another, you can be sure that the button just pushed is our own. What within us is being triggered by the other? That is where our work begins.
Take some time this week...when judgments arise, ask yourself why this action is found to be so annoying to you? Hold the question, write about it, try to recall when this action may have come up before at different times in your life. Do you ever do anything similar? What were some of the circumstances where you saw such incidents occur? The insights can be transformational. The balance it offers is worth the work, leading to a more peaceful heart and mind.
Love and blessings, Joann Turner