Sept/Oct 2002
Dear Louise by Louise Hay

Louise L. Hay is a metaphysical teacher and the author of 20 books, including: You Can Heal Your Life, Empowering Women, and Life! Heal Your Body A-Z. Since beginning her career as a Science of Mind minister in 1981, she has assisted thousands of people in discovering and using the full potential of their own creative powers for personal growth and self-healing.Louise's works have been translated into 25 different languages in 33 countries throughout the world.

Dear Louise: I’m currently unemployed and looking for work. Also, I’m very interested in getting married and having a family. But so far nothing has happened in these areas. I feel stagnant and lost, especially by being out of work. Please let me know what your thoughts are about these concerns. S.C., Canada

Dear S.C., You’ll want to open your consciousness to unlimited opportunities with respect to both work and marriage. You can’t let your mind dwell on negative scenarios. Your thinking creates your experiences, so don’t waste any thoughts. Feeling stagnant and lost is only a thought. Let it go.

Let’s explore some new thinking. Affirm: I love who I am. I have a wonderful life. I have a great job. I work with people I love. Good things come to me in surprising ways. My life is filled with love. I deserve and accept a meaningful relationship. My life gets better all the time. This kind of positive thinking will bring you what you’re seeking.

Dear Louise, I grew up in a family that was incredibly abusive, and on my pathway to healing myself, I find that I feel self-blame and self-hatred if I believe I "chose" my family of origin. I don’t want to cut myself off from your teachings, but this is a hard concept for me. Could you explain further? ? R.L., Fort Myers, FL

Dear R.L., When we first hear that we chose our parents, we all get angry. I was once furious that someone would suggest that I chose my parents. So it’s a normal reaction for you to be angry at me. I’m the messenger with the unwelcome message. The first step toward healing is resistance. In time, if you continue to learn to love yourself, you’ll come to understand. For now, just let it be.

As abusive as your parents were, they must have learned that behavior somewhere. Do you know what their childhoods were like? How did they get from being tiny, innocent babies to the people that abused you? If you can, learn what it was like for them to be little children. In time, you’ll develop compassion, and from there, forgiveness. And then you will be free.

There’s always a lesson in everything we experience. What do you feel you learned as a child? You certainly learned how not to treat children. You learned to seek a better way to live and to understand life.

Many, many people I’ve worked with who are experiencing conflict or estrangement from their families have found peace and healing by using the following affirmation: "I HAVE LOVING RELATIONSHIPS WITH EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY, INCLUDING MY FATHER [or mother or both]. This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to see or talk to them. What it does mean is that you release your attachment to outcome and open your heart to healing and peace.

If you want some support, locate a Religious Science church close to you. Many churches offer a variety of different groups that could be of great benefit to you.

Dear Louise, It seems as if there are times when I’m working with affirmations and treatment for a specific purpose and I’ll get just the opposite—the negative result. And, of course, there are those times when everything works beautifully. As far as I know, at least on a conscious level, I’m using the same process and have the same level of belief. What’s happening?
S.R., Pennsylvania

Dear S.R., It’s those hidden beliefs that trip us up every time! When I do affirmations for a specific situation, I always end by saying, "If there is any pattern or belief within me that is denying my fulfillment, then I now release it and let it go. I deserve and accept that which I am affirming. And so it is!" Try that and see what happens.

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