Where do you put your Attention?

I am the prosecutor and the defense, the judge and the jury, the defendant and the trial. I am the truth and the lie. I am the ground of a drama that plays itself out each waking moment, and in my dreams as I sleep. Within me the universe dances its mysterious dance of consciousness and ignorance, awareness and illusion.

From the deep well of subatomic processes, my material self erupts into existence, coiling itself into a double helix, the atomic, molecular substrate of the vehicle I know as “me.” Here the universe reaches into the void and builds itself out of itself as a temporary living material moment. In me the universe makes transitory meanings, pronouncements, and falls into the illusion of permanence. And at the same time it experiences the pleasure of being lulled to sleep by the gentle rocking of a sailboat, sliding against the constant valence of a hydrogen/oxygen ocean. The ocean inside me vibrates in sympathetic resonance. I sail nowhere and everywhere.

Here the universe, from time to time, raises up its eyes from a narrow mundane focus and looks into the ocean of the sky. There, once again, in me, as me, the cosmos experiences awareness and time, a slice through the middle of now, between the infinitely large and the infinitely small

&#Who am I?” the universe asks itself. Am I a monkey and a man? Am I the torrent of hormones coursing through my veins as emotions? Am I my job, my car, my lover, my friend? Am I my thoughts? Am I the answer to my questions? Am I a point in time and space, trying to know myself from the inside out, or the outside in? Am I the names of things? Am I the poems I write to myself?

What amazing experiences the universe has of itself. Plucking an orange from its tree self, it tastes itself in the mouth of its primate self and knows the transitory experience of sweet, juicy pulp. Without me, does the orange know the sweetness of its own taste? If I do not sniff the air, does the jasmine flower enjoy its own perfume? If I did not know you, would I know my own sorrows and joys?

At the Village Grill the universe eats a fried chicken dinner self, and looks out the window from the counter seat where it marvels at the play of light and color. From its limited perspective, it pretends a setting sun bathes everything in rich hues, while primate selves ply the sidewalks like monkey boats searching for coffee and chocolate.

It is a dizzying dance. One moment my head swirls with the images of stars, and I dream galaxy dreams. In the next instant I fall to earth, and the churnings inside me focus my attention on who is here and who is not, as if possibilities crossed over a line into never’s.

I look out on the world through the cradle of my skull, and try to sense the all in all. It is a stardust brain, in a stardust body, focused on the interface of always and never, measuring time with despair and hope, and all the feelings in between, interwoven through the synaptic tangle of my mind.

Strange, isn’t it, that “what isn’t” commands our attention as if it were real? What else are memories, but chemical states the body hoards, as if there weren’t enough now’s to go around? It is an amazing trip, when I remember to step out of the chemically conditioned soup I’ve become.

I thrill when I remember to experience myself as the interface of soft touches and waves breaking on the beach, in the sound my brain makes, pretending to wail like seagulls or the wind in trees. It is a molecular machine that programs itself to stand up and look around, and eventually, after stripping away gods and certainties, and the tyranny of its self programmed emotional milieu, to ask itself how it came to be aware in the way it is, and to see itself in every rock and blade of grass.

How is it that we are aware; that we are at all? And where will I put my attention next?

David Lintner, a former Lutheran Pastor, has been involved in NLP and Ericksonian Hypnosis for 15+ years. David conducts NLP training and seminars for businesses and the general public. He offices in Claremont, CA. e-mail: defel@gte.net 909-621-6883

Sept/Oct 2002

NLP and Spirituality

Where do you put your Attention?

by David Lintner